The weather in New York has finally started to get warmer and with media and the Coronavirus hype, kids everywhere are feeling like caged animals.

Like many other parents in my neighborhood, I took this opportunity to get out of the house. My poor, sweet little angels had been cooped up all winter with no park. For Queens kids, the park is not only the coolest place on earth, but the social hub for all the neighborhood kids. I picked up my son from Pre-K and took my two year old daughter to get some fresh air and exercise. As we were chasing our soccer ball, and swinging on swings with the fresh air and sun in our faces, I couldn’t help but think how nice a cocktail would be. I wondered if it would still be nice outside by the time we got home.

Like all mothers I have occasionally peed my pants (just a little, a drop or two) if I really had to go to the bathroom and someone dared to make a funny joke or if I had to sneeze. It is fairly normal whether you bitches talk about it or not.

Yesterday, for the first time in my life, I peed for no reason. I’m not sure if it was my wishful cocktail on the brain or what but I peed my pants. At the park. In the middle of the afternoon. I didn’t have to go, no one made me laugh, and it isn’t allergy season. I just straight up felt pee coming out and running down my leg. I even tried to stop it and couldn’t! I immediately looked at those beautiful little body destroyers and wanted to two finger punch them off the slide.

Thank the good Lord for black stretchy pants and long jackets. It’s hard out here for a mom.